Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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