I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize