a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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