So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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