My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
Is it penis luge time yet?
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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