dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
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