Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Randomize
