Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
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