Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Randomize
