if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
