just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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