toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize
