Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
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