Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
Randomize
