I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
Randomize
