Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
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