just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Randomize