yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Randomize
