speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
