Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
literally had 100 drinks last night.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
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