Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
Michael Bay diarrhea
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
