no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
