so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
so much tequila, so little girl.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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