Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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