I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Define "chronic" masturbator.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
it glows. i had to have it.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Randomize
