Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
My penis needs a shock collar
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
