Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
Randomize
