every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
