I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
It's shark week go big or go home
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Randomize
