the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
