They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
