I'm jealous of your bromance
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
