Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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