I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
