he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
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