He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
