talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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