I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
i will never coherently bang her
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
