Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Randomize