YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
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