There is no way he is gay with that hair.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Randomize