whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
40s are totally the cure
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Randomize
