how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize