would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Randomize