I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
