I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Randomize
