belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Randomize
