ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Randomize
