walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
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