He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize