There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
