Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
You are the jesus of drinking
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize