He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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